Danse Macabre

I may be turning 21 soon enough, but I think I’m still stuck in my adolescent phase.

Pei kee, my form6 classmate texted me on a stormy  Thursday afternoon (stormy only to me because,  I couldn’t walk back from college to my room), and imparted a snippet of information I wish I never laid eyes on. You know the saying which goes something along the lines of “(subject’s) heart dropped to the feet”? well, I experienced that.

So she’s missing.

Okay….

People don’t go missing just like that. No, wait. People I PERSONALLY know don’t just go missing like that.

I honestly think she’s the nicest classmate I have, apart from my own gang. She sat in front of me. We went to pangkor on a class trip together. They made a cute couple.

What the hell.

Enter “personal fable”. That stage in adolescent egocentrism where an adolescent (duh) thinks, among other egocentric thoughts, that one is invincible. That “the bad stuff” will never happen to them. Well, in my case, to me and the people around me. I still think that. Even after I had a friend, a friend who was kinda good friends with me in primary school (good friend back in those days were labeled to those you had lunch with, to those who waited together with you for parents to pick you up after school, to those you always sat in front of you during exams because her surname, also, starts with a “C” and are alphabetically arranged in the name register.) lost to cancer. And I still keep this hanky thing from her funeral. Even after, on a slightly more nicer note, another friend of mine got diagnosed with another form of cancer, but has apparently managed to have it under control. Pray to God that it stays that way. Until now.

i am a lousy catholic, I admit, but now I pray, PRAY that everything will be ok. For her.

You do the same too. Please.

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